The meta-title of Bill Kristol’s most recent column is “The future of the GOP is outside the Beltway.” I saw this and thought, wow — Kristol is right. In fact, the future of the GOP is not only outside the Beltway, it is also outside anyplace with reliable cell phone service. The way it’s going, I expect the GOP to make a last stand somewhere near a bald cypress bog in rural Mississippi, no later than the end of 2016.
However, the perpetually sunny Kristol thinks it’s a great time to be a conservative. This is because more people self-identify as “conservative” than as “independent” or “liberal.” As I’ve said of such surveys in the past, nobody knows what those terms mean any more. Thus, the self-identification is meaningless.
To see what I mean, check out the comments to this Hot Air post. Allahpundit complains that the teabaggers are splitting the Republican vote in NY 23, making a Dem win likely. In Glenn Beck world, apparently it is more important to purge moderates from the Republican Party than to defeat Democrats.
“One crushing defeat away from total victory, in perpetuity,” Allah grumbles. “What is the endgame?”
The endgame, according to the commenters, is to cleanse the GOP of alleged RINOs. Once this has been done, the GOP then will retake its natural place as the dominant party, and liberals will once against be drop-kicked out of sight. “The end game is to make the GOP so afraid of a third party happening that they start articulating some coherent conservative arguments and principles and nominate candidates who are not liberals,” says one. Another says, “The end game is a break of the stranglehold the dem and repub parties maintain on the electoral process, financing system and electorate, returning a representative republic to the people.”
They’re sounding like Ralph Nader supporters ca. 2000. I’m not sure Kristol himself would qualify as a “conservative” with this crowd.
Kristol notes that the current front-runners for the 2012 Republican nomination are all people who are not in office at the moment — Huckabee, Romney, Gingrich, Palin, in no particular order. Steve M explains that current officeholders have a big disadvantage with the wingnuts:
“Current officeholders, even Republicans, have to act with some reference to objective reality.”
Clearly, a huge turn-off to teabaggers.
Steve compares wingnut government strategy to the Underpants Gnomes Business Model of South Park, which is:
- Collect underpants
- ?
- Profit
Look famaliar? How about —
- Get rid of Saddam Hussein
- ?
- Peace in the Middle East
or
- Cut taxes
- ?
- Revenues increase
It’s all so plain now. Why didn’t I see this before?
“The meta-title of Bill Kristol’s most recent column is “The future of the GOP is outside the Beltway.†I saw this and thought, wow — Kristol is right. In fact, the future of the GOP is not only outside the Beltway, it is also outside anyplace with reliable cell phone service. The way it’s going, I expect the GOP to make a last stand somewhere near a bald cypress bog in rural Mississippi, no later than the end of 2016.”
Maja, you are brilliant. This is the best thing I’ve read all day!
The Right will never find the solution until they can identify the problem. They’re unwilling to take a hard look at their shortcomings, so they’re doomed to sputter around like the clueless blowhards they actually are.
I can just see the remake of “Dr. Strangelove” with Rush Limbaugh cast as the crazy General Jack D. Ripper. – “I can no longer sit back and allow Liberal infiltration, Liberal indoctrination, Liberal subversion and the international Liberal conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.
the future of the GOP is not only outside the Beltway, it is also outside anyplace with reliable cell phone service.
I LOLed.
From what Kristol writes I can only conclude his working definition of “conservative” is “crazy” – Bob K, I also thought of Jack D. Ripper.
I call the “?” step “And then a miracle occurs,” from an old cartoon about mathematicians that I saw years ago. Despite repeated letdowns, the wingnuts remain ever hopeful that this time will be different.
Well, to be fair, that hope belongs to politicians of all sorts, not just the wingnutty variety.
And I wonder about mentioning “Collect underpants” and wingnuts in the same post… what with their wild secret fetishes and all. (Hint: wingnuts are the Underpants Gnomes.)
Collect Underpants
?
Profit
wait, wait – I know this one. Mitt Romney & Glenn Beck both wear magical UNDERPANTS – there’s your winning ticket for 2012. Better not print this – Don’t want to get on the LDS hit list :^)
That is great Maha. You captured what I tried to say in my comment log of the last post much better than I could have. I’ve really been meaning to check out the book I heard about a little while ago about the connection of this part of the country to meth and how this area is so distract that meth is the only economic chance. Wait a minute, I live in that part of the country!?! Aughh, what am I doing here?
“The future of the GOP is outside the Beltway.â€
Or outside this solar system to a distant planet known as you betcha! Though the dimwitted teabaggers, beckerheads, and dittoheads seem way too far out in tin foil land, it will only take a day or two of audio reprogramming from their respective leaders (not sure who really leads the dimwitted teabaggers, they may be a problem) and the fringe wing-nutters will get right back in line, ready to goose step their way back to power. All this “splitting the party in two†stuff is just the wing-nut masters showing off, a right-wing pissing match of sorts. When it comes time to defeat the afrosocialistdespot Obama they will all get in lock step. The country can’t afford to have “them” in charge any longer than possible!
I run the risk of getting my head ripped off if I misquote Barbara, but she described in a previous post how the liberal movement broke up in the 70’s into splinter factions, each of which claimed to be the voice of liberalism. The GOP promoted a conservative brand of identity politics from the time of the Southern Strategy, and now they have fallen victim to it.
Identity politics is now the GOP (which is not to say that Democrats are untited – but compared to the GOP, we are playing like the undefeated Miami Dolphins.) The GOP has no influence over these groups anymore. Quite the opposite – these groups have tuned on the GOP leadership.
Disaffected Republicans have gone Independent in droves, which means they have no power to select a GOP candidate in 2012. Oooopps. Let’s see how this plays out. SP can’t play nice with the GOP kingmakers and has no intention of trying. Either they crown her Queen in 2011, or she will ‘Go Rogue” and start a 3rd party.
The GOP will probably pick up seats in the House and the Senate in the mid-term unless the Democratic base turns out, and a lot of the troops deserted the day after Obama was sworn in, because they thought the battle was won. The GOP will make a lot of noise after ‘victory’ after 2010, but they will come apart at the seams – literally – in 2011/2012 and the next 2 election cycles will determine whether the GOP goes the way of the Whigs & Torys.
I would not assume this means victory for a liberals. In the chaos, we MIGHT make advances if we can convince a lot of voters that progressives are making sense. NOBODY is making the case today that the founding fathers WERE liberal if you update their philosophies to the issues of our time. Case in point: taxes.
“The rich alone use imported articles, and on these alone the whole taxes of the General Government are levied. … Our revenues liberated by the discharge of the public debt, and its surplus applied to canals, roads, schools, etc., the farmer will see his government supported, his children educated, and the face of his country made a paradise by the contributions of the rich alone, without his being called on to spend a cent from his earnings.” –Thomas Jefferson to Thaddeus Kosciusko, 1811. ME 13:41
“The rich alone use imported articles, and on these alone the whole taxes of the General Government are levied. … Our revenues liberated by the discharge of the public debt, and its surplus applied to canals, roads, schools, etc., the farmer will see his government supported, his children educated, and the face of his country made a paradise by the contributions of the rich alone, without his being called on to spend a cent from his earnings.†–Thomas Jefferson to Thaddeus Kosciusko, 1811. ME 13:41 Thanks for that quote Doug Hughes – I expect any minute to hear a Faux News sock puppet declaring that Thomas Jefferson was a closet SOCIALIST
: ^ )
Great analysis Doug. I still stick to my guns – the GOP doesn’t have a prayer of winning squat in 2010 or 2012.
I love the South Park analogy. I think the GOP needs some re-branding from someone with a sane perspective, like these guys:
http://bit.ly/fxv3G
(satire)